posted 10-16-2007 02:54 PM               

So, first I'll start with the rules.

This was my adaptation of rules that were originally outlined by Azaelia. She was a member a long time ago and we were all very thankful that she took the time to put these into print. Some of this is my own personal spin on it, as they were adapted for RENT discussion board I founded myself a couple of years ago. Please read them carefully and please do your best to comply.

I. Moderators

A. Moderators must not abuse their power

Moderators – yes, by all means be firm. But please be respectful. Much too often, I see moderators flaming people for “breaking rules” when in fact, nobody was breaking them. I have also seen moderators choosing favorites – it’s obvious and annoying. Don’t do it.

However…

B. Moderators are not all evil

There seems to be an assumption that if there’s rules, the moderators and admins are evil. Some rules are for a reason. Sure, rules can be unreasonable, but to be honest, I find that the most discussion and people friendly boards are those with some slightly strict rules – many that reinforce those listed below.

II. Be mindful of space limits

Don't post just to post. Yes, funny is good, but random can be annoying if there’s honestly no point. Now, you can do what a board I go to has done, which is start a “random thread.” Or a thread on the subject you want to talk about. But if too many people post that they walked into a door/stepped on gum/have a cavity, space will be even more limited – when it doesn’t have to be.

That’s not to say you can’t post important news about yourself or anything; board members like knowing how you are doing. But random doesn’t have a place.

III. Don’t use the good old “eye catching” method.

On many boards I go to, there have been “catchy” thread titles. “EMERGENCY” really means “I got a stain on my white carpet”, and “I’m in trouble” ends up being about someone breaking a nail.

Yes, you want to have a thread title that gets people’s attention, but don’t purposely scare people into reading the threads. It’s a waste of time, and quite frankly, results in the Boy Who Cried Wolf effect. If it happens enough, people who really do need urgent help/advice are less likely to be believed – especially if they have a history of making dramatic thread titles.

IV. Know that netspeak isn’t “c001” Sure, a “u” and “lol” once in a while is fine. But because people often have limited time, they pay attention to messages that are readable.

And unfortunately, people tend to judge the message by how it is written. “Y did u say that” isn’t going to be taken as seriously as “what makes you say that?”
As for ALL CAPS – that’s shouting. Enough said.

V. Yes, Virginia, there is such thing as “too much information”

Nobody really wants to know your sex life. Nor how many times your son threw up in the toilet. That sort of thing belongs in your personal journal, an email, or a phone call to a friend.

Similarly - no shout outs, unless it's a forum that is for that. (I have been to boards with forums that are specifically for shout outs). Nobody cares.

VI. Don’t abuse newbies

Let’s look at it in real life terms. I think we all have moments where newbies can get, okay, annoying. The new neighbors let their kids play the radio outside very loudly, co-workers take much too long lunch breaks, etc.

But in their defense, haven’t we been new at some point ourselves? Surely we’ve all had times where something one neighbor didn’t mind was a pet peeve to another, had teachers who’d get mad at something you never had a teacher not approve of, etc. We didn’t even realize what we were doing was unacceptable.

In those cases, which people have we appreciated more – those who took us aside and corrected us gently, or those who made us feel stupid in front of everyone present?

This applies to messageboards as well.

Don’t yell at the member in front of the entire board – correct them, yes, but not in a patronizing or harsh way. If you think you might sound harsh, try and take it to PM.

All that said…

VII. Newbies, you have an obligation

Read the site and/or forum rules. Browse around a bit.

Yes, newbie abuse is wrong, but sometimes there’s really no excuse. Posting to complain that a book site’s theme is wrong, for instance, makes no sense. Would you go to a club for people with Poodles and ask why they were stupid enough to prefer Poodles over Chihuahuas?

VIII. Starting flame wars isn’t funny, nor is there a reason

I have failed to go to a message board where there hasn’t, at some point, been at least one member who took pride in getting people upset.

Why?

There is no need to bring politics into a thread where someone mentions going to Australia for vacation. If someone mentions their husband being Catholic, there is really no reason to ask if he kills abortion doctors.

Debate is fine, but either start a debate thread, or drop the subject.

IX. Starting behind-the-board flame wars isn’t funny or reasonable either

Again, I have come across people who seem to honestly like making everyone at the boards have something against one another.

I don’t mean complaining about an argument with one member. I mean telling Poster A how Poster B probably does drugs, then telling Poster B how Poster A and Poster E are rude to you in emails and IM’s. Then you tell Poster Z that Poster X is a racist, and Poster X that Poster L is a sexist. Finally, Poster K can be assured that Poster B actually threatened to hack the boards.

Does that sound like middle school to you? It sounds like middle school to me too. Yet a lot of these offenders are adults who ought to know better.

Why is it harmful, if it’s not on the boards? Because it creates bad feelings. This happened to a group of us at a board I go to, and we haven’t had the same relationship since, because we now know each other’s mortal flaws. Plus, we know who was hearing bad things about about us, and who said those things to begin with. Not nice.

Besides, do you really want to act like you’re still in fifth grade? That’s not something to be proud of.

Something else to keep in mind – when we get upset, we do blow things out of proportion. So you may think you’re being harmless, yet you’ve just told 87 members how the other 87 members are all evil. You may not have meant it that way, but the damage has been done.

X. Don’t feed the troll

A troll is someone who is posting to cause a scene. Just don’t give in. (If you have been feeding the troll, and action is taken against the troll, your account may be affected, don't think that just because you arn't the problem you are immune to the punishment).

These really are simple rules, and I think that if people would try and follow them, message boards wouldn’t have so many problems.

Also we have a common, much shorter, set of rules that we used to use when introducing new people to the boards. I'm having trouble finding them right now so I'm going to ask that one of the other members, perhaps part of our former "welcoming committe" pleas find those and just post them here. Thanks.

I'd also like it very much if people would please just drop a line in this thread introducing yourself a little bit. Maybe tell us a little about yourself. Even older members, this way wa can all get to know each other over again.

I'll re-introduce myself after someone else has posted so that can serve as a seperate post from this RULES post.

Thanks everyone.

posted 10-17-2007 12:04 PM               

anyhow, my name helen, i'm 22 years old. I live in canada. i love the GM books, as well as Harry Potter and The Time Traveler's Wife, which have all been discussed here.

posted 10-17-2007 12:25 PM            

LLK, I think those are great rules you posted and if we are able to someday have the sticky notes application, I vote that those be the rules.

Anywho, I'm Melissa, 24 from the Boston area. I'm a self-proclaimed musician, practice yoga in all my spare time (getting my instructor cert soon!). I have an unhealthy obsession with Life Is Good, Yankee Candle, and shoes. I have three tattoos and will be getting my fourth in Feb. I love to read (obviously), have become recently obsessed with CSI:, aaaand, I don't know what else to say.

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Let's go and get tangled in chains of GOLDEN days.

posted 10-17-2007 04:01 PM               

If you wanna move in with me you're welcome to. The rent would be about 400 dollars a month and you have to share a bathroom with my roomie but she's OCD so it's alwys clean and I pay all the utilities so it's a sweet deal!

I'll even buy you a hermit crab and we can call it Goyle!

I am sorry though. That sucks major donkey.

Anyway, my turn!

I'm Kathy, I'm 20, I'm a Junior in college and I'm doing a double major in Creative Writing and History with a concentration in religion. I have to choose by the end of the semester if I want to go for the teaching licensure or take the other history branch in Museum Curation. I'm leaning towards the latter. I was offered a publishing contract from a lesser publisher over the summer and after serious consideration I decided to turn them down. I'm holding out for Harper Collins. I'm partly responsible for PaN's CSI obsession and I adore her for playing along with me. That's about it.

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By: Twins1729

posted 10-17-2007 04:12 PM            

Elle you're seventeen already? My goodness!

Well I don't feel like giving out much of anything. I am self proclaimed writer, let's just say that. I apologize for not adding to the pot of "getting to know you."

posted 10-17-2007 04:19 PM               

Now what am I supposed to do with the hermit crab?

posted 10-17-2007 04:30 PM            

Hey, I'm Dominique, but then thats too long a name to type out so I go by SC on these boards. I'm fourteen years old (turning 15 this November) and I am, like PaN, a self-proclaimed musician, a literature junkie, and a dancer. I'm from California (now that I think about it, I can't seem to remember anyone else on these boards from here. Strange).

helen, I'm so sorry to hear about your breakup. I send you my love *hugs*.

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Always up or down, never down and out.

posted 10-17-2007 04:45 PM               

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By: Twins1729

posted 10-17-2007 05:01 PM            

Oh, and Rhiannon, Happy early Birthday!!

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Let's go and get tangled in chains of GOLDEN days.

posted 10-17-2007 05:13 PM               

I don't really know why she left, maybe because of the spam? Maybe because she moved out.

I'll send her a quick txt and tell her that someone was aksing about her on the boards. Maybe that'll convince her to come back.

posted 10-17-2007 05:15 PM            

PaN, I mainly dance jazz/lyrical, but I've dabbled in hip hop. What about you?

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Always up or down, never down and out.

posted 10-17-2007 05:47 PM            

And SC, I do hip hop myself.

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Let's go and get tangled in chains of GOLDEN days.

posted 10-17-2007 07:52 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Rhiannon18:
My name is Gabrielle...have I mentioned that before?
Im 15 tommorow. Besides that...hmm. I broke two bones in my leg by tripping over a pillow?

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My name is Alexis. I'm also going to be 15 tomorrow! What else can I say, well, I'm a cheerleader of nine years now. That's about it.

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[This message has been edited by Wicked Awesome (edited 10-17-2007).]

posted 10-19-2007 10:17 AM               

I'm Cheryl (call me Minxy or Jersey.. or Cheryl of course.) I'm 22 (AND A HALF!)I live in Missouri currently but I grew up in New Jersey. I am currently about two months pregnant with a zombie baby.

Ummm I love to read, get tattooed, and I collect stars and teddy bears.

posted 10-19-2007 10:45 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by munchkin:
I'm Laura, I'm 20 (still haven't got used to that... it hit me the other day that I'm in my twenties. Scary). I'm studying architecture at Newcastle (in England). That's about it.

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I realized the other day that I'm going to be 21 in less than two months. It's just... wild. I'll be this official grown up wherever I go. I'll be able to go into whatever places I want, buy whatever things I want. Moreover, I'm never going to be seen as "underage" or "a minor" again. In a month and a half I'm going to be in a whole new stage of my life. I know that 21 really isn't all that old... but still... I can't believe that I'm pretty much there.

posted 10-19-2007 07:57 PM               

I am Matthew (or Matt). I am from Wisconsin... oh gosh, you think you know yourself until you're asked to summarize who you are...

I am 17 (18 in April), and plan to be a music major in college. Still debating between oboe and musical theatre. Only acceptances can tell I suppose. I am actively involved in musical theatre, band, show choir, forensics, and I have a habbit of overloading myself with crap I have no time for.

posted 10-20-2007 11:51 PM               

I'm Tasha, or Natasha (I know, it'll be hard to remember my name!). I'm 20 and a Junior in college. I'm majoring in Psychology and minoring in Philosophy. I'm a psychology nerd...completely. But that's how I know that I'm going into the right field. Long term goal is to become a college professor after getting my PhD. I want to do research on Animal Cognition, specifying in communication in primates. Essentially, if you remember KoKo the gorilla (they taught her sign language) it's generally that sort of thing.

I'm incredibly busy this year, full of things to do and it's going to be rough. I'm the chair of a committee and we're in a major contract-rewrite for the campus I attend. And I go to school in Wisconsin - the only state to NOT have passed a budget for their university system yet this year...joy...

There's a lot more to me than that stuff, but as I've written quite a great deal already, I'll hush up and let you find out more about me on your own!

posted 10-21-2007 08:11 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by FabalaFae:
I'm Kyndall, I'm 14 years old and probably the youngest person who pays attention to everything that goes on in this forum. I'm in California too. So who ever said no one else in the forum is from CA is wrong.

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I'm from CA too and I'm 13! Oh and my name is Mikayla! (I can finally give out my name a long as I don't give out my home address)

P.S. I did not mean to write one post right after another! I just saw what FabalaFae wrote and i had to say something!

posted 10-21-2007 09:33 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by helenbooktrip:
hey TJ! where has YOU been missy?

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posted 10-22-2007 12:19 PM            

We just can't stay away for long.

posted 10-22-2007 01:20 PM            

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Let's go and get tangled in chains of GOLDEN days.

posted 11-12-2007 11:56 PM               

Cheers, Annmaree.

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Dont make me send my flying monkeys after you!