posted 12-01-2007 12:02 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by lostladyknight:
assier (is that a word?).

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If it isn't, it should be made one.

To answer the question, no Yero you aren't an ass at all. Just the fact that she wouldn't give you gas money says it all.

posted 12-04-2007 02:10 PM               

Trust me.

posted 12-26-2007 12:06 AM               

The story is called Rainswept, and it's about a German girl who is Jewish, and survives her stay at a concentration camp. Unfortunately, she becomes paralyzed from abuse, but is adopted anyway by a couple. She doesn't remember anything about her past except for the rainstorms and what happened during them. This is the introduction.

The narration switches from her telling stories about herself to the third-person of what is happening around her. I wanted to test myself with a "limited" protagonist, someone couldn't do everything I asked her to do. And so came a paralyzed little girl, who could only move her face but nothing else.

-

All I remember was the rain. Soft and cold and clean and wet. Pattering on the slanted roofs. Just a drizzle to me, but I felt sorry for the butterflies, flimsy wings and tiny bodies and all. They would fall to the ground one by one, peaceful but destroyed, with their dark wings spread out in display. A glamorous end to a meaningless life. At least I was not a butterfly. I thought I was strong. I loved sneaking out and running in the gentle storm, not regretting the coughs which would soon come afterwards. I would always forget what happened next. All I remember was the rain.

One of the bird’s nests in the backyard fell from its unstable perch and was ruined, but we saved the eggs and laid them on a makeshift bed of cloth scraps and broom’s straw, placing it in its original spot. But we never saw the mother bird again. I think those eggs are still there, rotting and shining in the glassy rain. All I remember were the rain and the eggs.

Someone would scold me and shout at me, but never spanked me. He knew it was bad to hit a girl. I would be standing in the room, dripping and coughing and smiling, but still listening. If he called me “reckless” I would blink once or twice. If he called me “disobedient” I would lick my cold, blue lips. But if he called me “rain-loving little creature” I would wrap myself in my arms and give a sigh. He would always embrace me afterwards, and give me a drink for my cough. All I remember were the rain and the eggs and a ‘someone’.

But most of all the rain.

-

So, my question is, what do you think?

[This message has been edited by A Mile Above Oz (edited 12-26-2007).]

[This message has been edited by A Mile Above Oz (edited 12-26-2007).]

posted 12-26-2007 12:59 PM               

at the end when it says something like "i remember the eggs and the rain and a'someone'"...i'm not sure how good the word 'SOMEONE' sounds. maybe use the word 'HIM'. thats just me though. its your piece and it all depends on how you feel about it.
other than that one little word, i think its great!!

posted 12-29-2007 12:23 PM               

Elphaba: Glinda, why couldn't you have stayed calm for once around the shoes. I hope you're happy. I hope you're happy now. I hope you're happy how you hurt that old lady that was trying to get the shoes from you forever, I hope you think that helped you.

Glinda : I hope you're happy. I hope you're happy too. I hope you're proud how you tried to break up the fight. I hope you think that helped.

Both: so though I can't imagine how, I hope you're happy right now.

E: Glinda, listen to me. Just return the shoes. You can still have that purple tank-top, what you've saved up your salary for. you can have all the clothes you've ever wanted

G: I know, but I don't want them, no, I can't want them anymore. Something has changed within me. Something is not the same. I'm through with wearing the clothes of someone else's wardrobe. To late to go to customer service. To late to ask for a refund. It's time to trust my co-ordination, closes my eyes, and shop. It's time to try defying my money. It's time to try defying my visa and soon I will be maxed out. I'm through trashing gift cards 'cause someone says they are past their expiration date. Somethings I cannot buy, until I try I'll never know. To long I've been afraid of loosing clothes I guess I've lost. Well if that's stuff it comes at much to high a price. It's time to try defying my money. It's time to try defying my visa and soon I will be maxed out. Quick, grab a bag

E: What, no

G: Unlimited, my wardrobe is unlimited and I've just had a vision almost like a prophocy. I know, it sounds truly crazy and, sure, the vision's hazy but I swear someday I'll be inside the Bay defying my money. It's time to try defying my visa and soon I will be maxed out. Well, are you coming.

E: No, sorry

Mall police: Hey, you, the green girl, can you help us, we're looking for a 20 year old female with blonde, curly hair and a glittery pink handbag. Have you seen her?

E: You mean my friend Glinda, ya. Why?

MP: Because wee have had a number of robberies by a person who fits that discription and... hey, you said you were her friend, right.

E: Correct

MP (radioing to home base): We have caught the "cute crimanal's" sidekick. Stand by for delivery.

(Glinda comes out from behind a bush)

G: She's not the one you want. It's me, O.K, It's me. So if you care to find me look in Cosco's. As someone told me lately "shop your heart out princess" and if I'm shopping solo, at least I'm shopping at all. For those who try to stop me take a message back from me. Tell them how I am defying my money. It's time to try defying my visa and soon I will be maxed out. And nobody, in all the mall, no shopper that there is or was is ever going to out shop me.

E: I hope you're happy with your purchases.

Shoppers: Look at her, she's maxed out. Get her card!

G: Out shop me

Shoppers: So we've got to show her her...

G (waving her bags in the air):AAAAHHHHHHHHHH

Shoppers: TTTTAAAAXXXXEEEESSSSSSSSSSS

So what do you think.

posted 12-29-2007 06:05 PM               

These are our two series: Ballad of the Drowned and Forgotten Continent.

Ballad of the Drowned takes place in a male-dominated society. There are different military-like groups known as Units. Because the society is male-dominated, women and girls are not allowed to join Units. There is only one Unit of female fighters: Dragon Unit, consisting of Rei, Shira, Kana, and Haruko. Dragon Unit, due to the fact it is all female, is not recognized by the Counsel as an actual Unit. Another Unit, Waterfall Unit, is their ally through family ties.

Forgotten Continent is a floating land mass that separated from where Ballad of the Drowned takes place. The divide was created by the 12 Great Mages, masters of their chosen element. The 12 elements are: Air, Medical, Ice, Metal, Light, Stone, Wood, Life, Water, Fire, Dark, and Weather.

The Dark and Light Mages split off from the main population to form their own groups. The Dark Mages became the MoonBandits and the Light Mages are now the SunKings. The ideals of the MoonBandits are a cross between the Barbarians and Ninja. They are ruthless when they fight and have a rule of 'take no prisoners', but they are extremely stealthy and prefer to rely on ambushes than out-right attacks on their enemies. The SunKings are an extremely religious group of Fascist-Communists. They believe that the Sun is the source of all power, but only if they first conquer all other groups around them. "Everyone is equal, just so long as everyone is a SunKing."-A SunKing General.

The third group is simply known as the Mages and is contrived of the ten remaining elements. The original Great Mages pass on their powers to others when they die, but only recently did the MoonBandits and SunKings break away. There are always 12 Great Mages, but finding the Great Light Mage may well be impossible.

The Mages are:
Arii (Are-ee)- Great Medical Mage,16f Dark Red
Dranii (Draw-nee)- Great Air Mage, 14f yellow LS of Izu
Izu (Ee-zoo)- Great Ice Mage, 16f Ice Blue BS of Dranii
Kerra (Care-ah)- Great Fire Mage, 17f Hot Pink TS of Ellor
Ellor (El-oar)- Great Metal Mage, 17m Rust Red TB of Kerra
Melah (Mel (like well) uh)- Great Water Mage, 14f Dark Blue
Saiya (sigh-yah)- Great Weather Mage, 15f Pale Pink
Tenorai (Ten-oar-eye)- Great Wood Mage 16m Brown
Nikara (Nih-kar-ah)- Great Life Mage, 16f Green
Kairo (Ki(eye) row)- Great Dark Mage 16m Purple
Gorron (Gore-on)- Great Stone Mage, 16m Gray

Kenrii (Ken-ree)- Grand Mage of Time and Space, age unknown m White Kenrii is an unusual Mage with the ability to control and manipulate the time-space continuum. Created by the 12 Great Mages when the divide was created, he is the only living being with immortality.

*LS=Little Sister
*BS=Big Sister
*TS=Twin Sister
*TB=Twin Brother
*#m/f=age and gender
*Color=signifies element to others (ie: someone wearing Dark Blue is most likely a Water Mage)

This post has now become very long and for that I apologize. And please please please nobody steal our ideas. Thank you for your input.

Edited to add colors

Edited again to add Kenrii
[This message has been edited by FabalaFae (edited 12-29-2007).]

posted 01-08-2008 05:42 PM               

Okay, so I've been addicted to facebook for a few months now, and I have met some people exclusivel through there; one of them was this guy we'll call...uh...Duke. Okay, so, he seems really nice and everything, he's a writer/photographer which is soo cool, and he said he wants to hang out this weekend.

Well, you know me, now I think he's a predator who wants to rape and kill me. It's all very "To Catch a Predator". But, I don't know if I'm just being cynical or if he's really dangerous.

Not to paint such a bad picture, though, I must say he does seem very nice, and I've looked over his profile and he seems legit; like, I don't think I'll be seeing some dirty old man who says that he's Duke.

posted 01-08-2008 06:17 PM               

I've met quite a few people from the internet and most of them have been positive experience. Even the ones that turned out to be jerks. However it's always important to trust your instincts. If you don't feel comfortable meeting him yet (or at all) then don't let him pressure you into it. Somebody who likes you will never pressure you into something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

If you do decide to go hang out, go out some place public.

posted 01-08-2008 07:58 PM               

trust your instincts Yero, but it doesnt hurt to take a few precautions.

posted 01-09-2008 06:14 AM            

Facebook tends to be easier to detect if they're legit or not because they have real friends responding to their page. Myspace is a little different because you really don't know where they could be from. Plus you can see other people's pictures of the person on Facebook and tell if he's really who he says is. His friends would have no reason to lie about who he is.

posted 01-09-2008 09:49 AM               

Public areas, as the others suggested, are a must. He's not likely to rape and murder you with people around that can dial 911.

Bringing a friend with you is a really good idea. It doesn't have to be a big buff bodyguard dude. Just someone who is more willing to help you than afraid to be there. Someone, else, who can call 911. This discourages predator activity, lol.

Do not be afraid to say "you know what? I think I should go home now..." at any point, at all, while you're with him.

Also, my biggest tip, don't be afraid to have fun with him too. I mean, you can't let your apprehensions get in the way of actually enjoying spending time with this guy. So until it feels safe not to, keep your guard up, but don't keep it in the forefront of your mind.

I have a friend that I met online and then met in person when I moved to the town I live in now. I didn't move here because it is where he lived, just because this was the school I wanted to go to, however... I don't regret moving close enough to see him on a daily basis. He's still one of the closest friends I've ever had and I love him very much. Even if... it kinda felt like we were starting the friendship at ground zero when we started hanging out in person. Even after 3 1/2 years of online friendship.

So, don't be afraid to have fun. You aren't going to have a real friendship with him if you are. Just be cautious.

AMOO, I actually have a thing or two I'd love to discuss with you regarding your search for a good critique. I've been running an online critique group for the last 4 months about. I've not made it any sort of secret that I want to expand it into ohter areas. I'd love for you to consider maybe sitting down with me, via email or other medium, and discussing ways we could incorporate more people and types of fiction in.

I think that you would quite possibly benefit very much from taking an active role in something like this. Right?

Right now it's a new story featured weekly. We have all the members write a five paragraph critique about the piece, and it's given a topic question to help shape the critique process. Anyway, I think it might be something you could be interested in.

------------------

posted 01-10-2008 09:16 PM               

note: i am canadian.

posted 01-24-2008 03:58 AM            

I know that someone is lying to me. but the way that I found out isn't exactly something I'm proud of, and that would get me in a lot of trouble if the person knew I did it. So how do I get said liar to fess up without putting myself in a compromised position?

posted 01-24-2008 05:52 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by FabalaFae:

The SunKings are an extremely religious group of Fascist-Communists. They believe that the Sun is the source of all power, but only if they first conquer all other groups around them. "Everyone is equal, just so long as everyone is a SunKing."-A SunKing General.

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Once having been a fantasy buff myself, and, after writing a paper (on direction of my 8th grade English teacher) about Communism and Hitler, I feel the need to address your point:

How can someone be Fascit and Communist? It is politically impossible.

Just to clarify for you, if you're confused, and as to explain my point a bit better:

Communist: Someone who believes, over all, in completeing Marx's six stages of Communism. (Someone believe that the revolutions of overthrowing the Nobles, and then the Bourgouesie will be violent, others will not...etc.etc. There are many varaiations). A Communist is someone who believes in Communism, moving foward so much to a Utopian, classless, perfect barter system society. (And subsuquently three eyed children, but we won't go into that.)

A Fascist: Someone who is reactionary. Wants to bring back their country to the glory days that, in reality, didn't really exist. They're bing on planting their feet in the past.

Therefore. Someone, espeically a group of people, who are religious (and by the way, Communism stamps out all religion, so you're stuck on that point), cannot be Fascit and Communist at the same time.

If they are communist, then they cannot believe in the sun being all powerful, because communism has no God, no relgion, and no dieties to speak of. You can even marry whomever you want, it's all for pleasing the overall society.

posted 01-24-2008 05:37 PM               

They have some of the values of a fascist society and some of a communist society. I guess their more fascist though.

posted 01-24-2008 10:46 PM               

anyhow...Pan,
maybe it depends how you found out. but either way, lets see. if i were you i would either send VERY subtle hints when in conversation with said person, and see if they finaly give in and fess up. or most likely i would ask them straight up "whats going on with blah blah blah?". but see, and this is going to make me look REALY bad, but give mea chance here...if they ask how you found out, explain it so that it sounds like you found out by some accident or another. if you want to email or facebook me in private, i might be able to help you come with a diplomatic way of going about this. if you fee comfortable enough to tell me the specific situation i would really like to try and help you out a bit more. email me or send me a message on facebook.
<3

posted 02-01-2008 09:51 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by helenbooktrip:
don't make fun of people with ADHD (i am self-diagnosed )

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My friend is awesome...although quite loopy at points. I'm not trying to make fun of anyone.
I have ADD...not that anyone would want to know...

posted 02-18-2008 08:19 PM               

1. Okay, my last relationship did not last very long, it wasn't even a relationship, it only lasted about 2 hours. The boy it was with had asked me out before, and i rejected him. Then when i heard he was going to ask somebody else out, i got upset and realized how much i really liked him! So I told him, and he rejected me, and then accepted me, then dumped me. There had been a rumor going around that he was going to ask me back out, and i got scared and DIDN'T want him to. Then I had a friend do research and he said he wasn't and that he didn't like me at all, and since me and him are still best friends that crushed me. But I have recently realized that i have loved him this whole time... How do I win his love? [[ps: he has a gf]]

2. I like dis boi... and i didn't want him to find out because we pretty much slept in the sam bed the night i started liking him [[it was at church]] and i figured he would feel really akward around me, and i am still jeoulous of his GF... it isn't fair...lolz, but then i tell one of his friends that i did trust, but he went and told him the same day, and i was avoiding this boi like crazy, then we were lab partners... now i need to know 1 thing, how do i get revenge on the backstabber [[and how do i win my crush's love]]

3. I know this boy and I am not sure if i still like him or not, we are BEST FRIENDS FOREVER, and i feel different around him but i still cannot tell if i like him, but if i do he has told me that he HATES having GF's because they "steal your stuff and break your heart" PLUS i have like 6 friends who like him... should i try to when his love???

4. There is yet again, ANOTHER BOI, and i told 1 of my ex-friends i liked him and she turned around and dated him, she dates all the bois i like, and has never really liked them, and she still won't break^ with him, and he really likes her, and i don't want him to get hurt, how do i bring it across to him that she is using him [[or win his luv]]

IDK WHO'S LOVE I GET, I JUST NEED A BF... I HAVEN'T HAD A REAL RELATIONSHIP SINCE 7th grade!!! i was 13 then, now i am 17...to long!!!

PLZ HELP!!!

posted 02-18-2008 08:44 PM               

Second if a guy has a girlfriend you need to back off. Adultery is wrong and you're only going to end up making yourself look bad. Besides if he's willing to leave someone for you he'll leave you when someone else comes along.

Third if you like all of those guys then you probably don't like any of them enough to have a meaningful relationship with them. You sound like you just want to be with someone, anyone, that's not a good place to be.

Focus on school, your friends and family, and being the best person you can. As long as you do all of that a good guy who's worth your time will come along... and you won't be in a relationship with someone less right when he does.

-LLK

posted 02-18-2008 10:15 PM               

so just relax and if anything, decide who you actually like and realize that you do not own them.

posted 02-19-2008 05:44 AM            

Is that seriously your biggest problem? And you do not love them. Don't even pretend as if you do. So, I really don't see what you're kvetching about. Who cares about dating anyway at that age?

posted 02-19-2008 03:30 PM               

And just a question, Since when have I been lying on these boards???

posted 02-19-2008 09:11 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by AdahPrice:
Fay, your post made me laugh out loud.

Is that seriously your biggest problem? And you do not love them. Don't even pretend as if you do. So, I really don't see what you're kvetching about. Who cares about dating anyway at that age?

[This message has been edited by AdahPrice (edited 02-19-2008).]

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kvetching! i like it. good word, sounds very jewish, which is never bad.

as immature as fay's problem might sound, i;m not sure i would make fun of it, even if it seems small in comparison to what other people go through. everyone has thier own problems that affect them differently. i for one, am happy for Fay that she doesn't have any bigger problems to deal with. So Fay, enjoy the small troubles while you can, because you never know when something big will hit.

quote:

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Originally posted by FAE.thay.lover:
but nobody answered one of my q's, how do i tell #4 that his girlfriend is using him, WITHOUT him turning around and telling her, i don't want him or her to get hurt[[i don't like her but i don't want her to hate me]]...
and i am desparate for a bf, i really do need one, and if i cannot have one of the people i really like, then i just won't accept one, i really LOVE the second one tho...

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okay if you want to tell this guy that you think his girlfriend is sketch, then just take him aside when you get a chance and express your concerns to him. just be careful of the way you word it and the tone you use.

now to me, the actual problem seems to be that you believe that you NEED a boyfriend. you do not. you do not need a boyfriend. the only way the right person will come along is if you can become happy with yourself and in your own INDEPENDANT life. having those qualities is the most attractive thing to another person. you have to get your shit together.

posted 02-20-2008 03:40 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by helenbooktrip:
kvetching! i like it. good word, sounds very jewish, which is never bad.

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I'm sorry, but Fay's post seemed very immature to me, I am happy that she doesn't have bigger problems to deal with, but it's just so... childish. I don't know the correct way to express it, I know I am coming off cynical but so be it.

And no one should ever, ever be desperate for a boyfriend. That is an awful thing to be. You don't need anyone to make you happy.
(As HBT said.)

But anyway, moving on.

posted 02-26-2008 05:45 PM               

At the end of You Can't Stop The Beat, if you leave it running for a few seconds, a short song starts - "Blood on the pavement, what a mess..."