posted 07-24-2007 06:33 PM            

Please for your own health, safety, and happiness, move on. You're young and have so much life ahead of you (cliche I know). But it's really true. College will be the best time of your life, but if you don't live to make it there, you'll never experience the freedom and fun.

Don't be scared to talk about your feelings. The worst thing is letting them bottle up and explode and feeling like a walking ticking time bomb.

posted 07-24-2007 08:42 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DefyingGravity4Life:
Ok, so I met this boy at the camp that I went to in Washington D.C., and we both really like(d) each other. This wasn't just some little crush either. Sad part is that he lives in Louisiana and I obviously live in NY. And that's a long story made short. I'm willing to have a long distance relationship and it's not like there are any guys in my life other than the ones that I've known since Pre-K. I want to ask him if we are "together" but I don't want to say something like that and when he just thought it was a summer thing. I was talking to my friends from camp and they said that it looked like we really liked each other and that I should just ask him about it. Should I just flat out ask him or just keep talking and wait to see if he brings it up? Any advice even on how to ask him? I'm not a very out-spoken person...

[This message has been edited by DefyingGravity4Life (edited 07-24-2007).]

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I'm in a similar situation. Although, he doesn't live so far away. (Same state.) But, I would say that you should ask him, just ask how he feels about you? Or something?

I'm no good at this.

posted 07-24-2007 09:35 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by DefyingGravity4Life:
Ok, so I met this boy at the camp that I went to in Washington D.C., and we both really like(d) each other. This wasn't just some little crush either. Sad part is that he lives in Louisiana and I obviously live in NY. And that's a long story made short. I'm willing to have a long distance relationship and it's not like there are any guys in my life other than the ones that I've known since Pre-K. I want to ask him if we are "together" but I don't want to say something like that and when he just thought it was a summer thing. I was talking to my friends from camp and they said that it looked like we really liked each other and that I should just ask him about it. Should I just flat out ask him or just keep talking and wait to see if he brings it up? Any advice even on how to ask him? I'm not a very out-spoken person...

[This message has been edited by DefyingGravity4Life (edited 07-24-2007).]

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posted 07-25-2007 01:14 PM            

You definitely shouldn't let him keep becoming more attracted to you by ignoring the situation. That will only lead him on and make him think there may be something.

Be gentle in how you word things. I was given the exact same phrase, "you're like a sister to me" and it was the worst thing for me to hear (seeing how he already has a sister). You want to make sure the focus stays on the friendship that you have now, being the most important thing. What I would say is something along these lines, "Your friendship means so much to me, that I don't want to lose you as that if something ever went wrong in a relationship. People say things wouldn't change if they broke up, but they always do. I value our friendship so much that I don't want to put it in jeopardy by taking this risk." Be prepared that he will be hurt, he will be upset that you won't even give it a shot, he might even become awkward initially, but just keep yourself grounded as his friend and make sure he knows you still want him as a friend. Talk to him as you do normally, continue to tell him all the things you would on a day-to-day basis, treat him no different and he will realize that your friendship is most important. If he likes you as much as he claims to, he won't be able to pull away from you completely, even after you telling him this.

posted 07-25-2007 10:30 PM               

One thing they did was my stepmom kept saying "She cant deal with my sister" or that my sister is terribly spoiled and freaks out when she doesnt get her way. Well, 1)She is BIPOLAR. Shes not spoiled or whiny, she has a disease. 2) Being slightly upset about making us sleep in a tent in 30 degree weather while the naval bases planes are taking off and landing every five seconds a mile away while you sleep in a house is not unreasonable.My stepmom has been awful concerning my sister.

And my dad even though he half the times has this warped male dominance thing (He told my sister in an email "Well, you cant get angry at your stepmom for anything she does because Im the father, and Im the head of the household and any decision must go through me." Riiiight, like in the 1800's maybe.) But then he does this blameless "Oh how sad Im driving you to the airport this is so sad" And after not talking to us, not even one word, after a three hour drive to the airport when he leaves us at security he starts CRYING. Now, my father and his family are all these swedish, only-communists-and-weak people-show-emotions kinda people. They dont even smile in pictures. And the only other time I saw him crying was when he was talking about when my brother died. Then after he says goodbye and starts crying, my older sister starts crying. So while the forty year old man with five children and who once was a spy for America, and my older sister who is going to be entering college this year both start bawling in the middle of the public airport, all I can think is: Shut the fuck up. Seriously. And then he sends me a text message about how his heart is brooooken and hes soooo sad and Im like "What the fuck, youre kicking us out of your house and you expect me to comfort you?"

But that makes me sound like a cold and heartless bitch. Its just so frusterating. And now I just wanna explain to my dad and stepmom why Im upset, but Im afraid they'll just think Im purposely trying to hurt them ((If someones mad at them, its because their cruel heathenistic people that enjoy others misery.)

So: How do I get my father to see what he did was wrong and maybe repair our relationship a little?

posted 07-27-2007 01:19 PM               

Is it normal to eat relatively nothing during the day other than drink coffee, then still not be hungry at dinner, then wake up in the middle of the night and FINALLY feel ravenous, even though throughout the entire day your stomache doesn't growl or ANYTHING that might signal hunger?

This has been happening since the alligator lizard died, but I don't neccesarily FEEL depressed, even though my dogs died within a week of each other so soon afterwards. I don't neccesarily feel anything right now, I'm kinda numb to everything but my dad, but I've always been like that.

posted 07-30-2007 07:16 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Wicked Awesome:
Hopefully someone can answer. I would love to be in a musical on Broadway one day but, I have never taken any singing lessons. Now my voice is pretty good on its own but, what can singing lessons really do to someone's voice? Does it help with the consistency of your voice? Can it improve your range? Now being realistic, a persons range won't increase drastically just by taking singing lessons, but will it increase at least a note or two? I really want to take singing lessons no matter in what way it helps (because I'm sure even improving a little bit helps and is worth it) but before I start shelling out money towards it, I wanted to know information about it and what someone can gain from it. For people that have taken singing lessons, what did you feel it did to your voice and how long did it take to hear some results?

[This message has been edited by Wicked Awesome (edited 07-30-2007).]

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Mainly, singing lessons help your breathing techinquies. Help you straighten out your flats and sharps, and really help you be able to learn to belt. Or, if you are trained operatically, then to help you hit high notes.

Yes, singing lessons do help.

posted 07-30-2007 09:06 AM               

Just about anyone can hit the notes, so range shouldn't be an issue. The teacher can help you make every register sound as nice as your comfort zone.

Also, I'm assuming you're under 18, so if you have ANY work with belting at all, it should be a bare minimum. Without a teacher's help, belting is just asking to wreck your voice.

posted 07-30-2007 08:27 PM               

i recently moved from KC to ATL and i left behind a very important guy friend. I have always had a crush on him but i never let him know. He calls me anytime to tell me things that are going on with him and is the only one from KC that seems to sincerely care about me.

Since we moved, i have felt very depressed and withdrawn from leaving him. I dont trust people (especially males) and hes the first one i have trusted. I dont want to lose him as a friend or anything else, but i know i have to try to move on.

posted 08-09-2007 11:35 PM               

Oh, by the way, I'm eating in the late afternoon now. I think I'm getting better, because I'm finally getting pissy when my brother hits me too hard. I think it was at least partly anxiety, because if you read the Rants and Raves thread, I mention my mom had gastric bypass surgery a couple days ago.

posted 11-24-2007 07:55 PM               

So I've been vegetarian for a year and a half now. I don't eat any meat or fish. I have always wanted to be vegan but I guess in my family of carnivors I don't really know how.

As a vegan highschooler (Yero), what did you eat, and how did you stay healthy. I'm willing to do without things like dairy and eggs, but beyond fruits and vegetables I have no idea where to start.

posted 11-25-2007 12:18 PM               

Well, as to have a healthy balanced diet, vegetables and frui are a must, so you're on the right track. But, don't rule out whole grains: whole wheat bread, whole wheat pasta, couscous, brown rice, even polenta.

Starches like potato and white rice are perfectly fine in moderation. I know, personally, if I don't have a potato in some form each day I'll go crazy, so...

As for specific meals, I could give you a breakdown of my typical day:

Breakfast (if I have it): Oatmeal/Muesli/Bran Flakes and/or fruit.

Lunch: Salad, veggie sushi, sometimes french fries.

Dinner: Green vegetable (spinach, salad, green beans, etc), a grain, sometimes an orange vegetable (squash, sweet potato, carrots) and I've found Eggplant to be a good "meat substitute".

Last but not least, the one thing I couldn't live without: Soy. Edamame, tofu, tempeh, soy sauce (not really in the same vein of thought, but...) they're all healthy and delicious. Believe me, I am a picky eater, and I was skeeved out by tofu once upon a time, but now I love it.

Even though it's not usually my style, I do sometimes eat those fake meat foods by Morning Star or some such company. They are surprisingly good and quick to make, but I'm not into processed foods. Also, be careful, because some products are not vegan.

posted 11-25-2007 09:01 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Yero the Hero:
Aww, I'm flattered!

Well, as to have a healthy balanced diet, vegetables and frui are a must, so you're on the right track. But, don't rule out whole grains: whole wheat bread, whole wheat pasta, couscous, brown rice, even polenta.

Starches like potato and white rice are perfectly fine in moderation. I know, personally, if I don't have a potato in some form each day I'll go crazy, so...

As for specific meals, I could give you a breakdown of my typical day:

Breakfast (if I have it): Oatmeal/Muesli/Bran Flakes and/or fruit.

Lunch: Salad, veggie sushi, sometimes french fries.

Dinner: Green vegetable (spinach, salad, green beans, etc), a grain, sometimes an orange vegetable (squash, sweet potato, carrots) and I've found Eggplant to be a good "meat substitute".

Last but not least, the one thing I couldn't live without: Soy. Edamame, tofu, tempeh, soy sauce (not really in the same vein of thought, but...) they're all healthy and delicious. Believe me, I am a picky eater, and I was skeeved out by tofu once upon a time, but now I love it.

Even though it's not usually my style, I do sometimes eat those fake meat foods by Morning Star or some such company. They are surprisingly good and quick to make, but I'm not into processed foods. Also, be careful, because some products are not vegan.

If I left anything out, just ask. I hope I was a help!

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Oh gosh, thanks a lot Yero that really does help. I've been easing myself into the whole vegan thing for a while, but I don't want to just eat less than before (especially since I didn't eat an incredible ammount in the first place).

For breakfast I've generally had wheat toast and/or fruit (though I don't always get a chance to eat breakfast). I feel stupid for not thinking of oatmeal, especially since plain oatmeal is one of my favorite foods (I can't stand that flavored boxed crap).

For lunch, I've been living off fruit. School food is inedible and the "salad" is iceberg lettuce and I'd be just as well off eating the bowl it comes in. However, lettuce goes brown when left sit till lunch, so fruit is basically all I've figured out.

While on the topic of lunch, do you have any soup suggestions. It just occured to me that all chowder and "cream of _______" soups no longer work really.

For dinner, (though I'm almost never home to eat, damn my busy schedule) I've been dealing with more fruit and vegetables.

Before going vegan I usually filled up the gaps with things like dairy and the like. Without that I feel like I'm really not even eating at all. I'm at a comfy 172 right now which for a 6' bigger built person should be okay, but going much lower than that is not what I aim for. I need to find easy filler foods for throughout the day I suppose. I don't really have time to cook gourmet vegan feasts ever.

Ah, one more question. You said eggplant is a good meat substitute. I guess I don't really know how. The only way I've eaten eggplant in the past has been sliced...

posted 11-25-2007 09:07 PM               

You could always purchase a DVD of Yoga exercises, or you could purchase what I have: this little deck of cards that has a zillion different positions on them. I in fact just finished doing my Yoga now....

posted 11-26-2007 01:01 PM            

MTO, I would agree with Yero, that the best way to get back into it is with a beginner's DVD. The only reason I'm not keen on the flashcards idea, is that I find them better suited for intermediate/advanced practice. They don't always tell you how to get into or out of a pose, which can be dangerous if you're not doing it properly. I actually made my own, and I'm sure they're fine for Yero because we're both seasoned yogis. Another way of getting into it is via books or magazines. They will usually tell you the best ways to enter the poses and come out. Another place I love and have bookmarked is www.yogajournal.com. There is a whole index of poses on the website that give very clear instructions on accomplishing each asana.

In terms of filler foods MTO, I'm not vegan, but it sounds like you need more grains and protein in your diet. It will help fill up many of those meals that you're not quite sure how to handle. Like yero said, whole wheat pastas and rices are great meals if made the night before. Another thing I absolutely love is granola. Also, you might want to try adding some nuts and beans into your diet as well, to help with the lack of protein. Hummus is fantastic with veggies or on whole wheat pitas.

(Edited so the Yoga Journal link works.)

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posted 11-26-2007 05:11 PM            

I think you're the gay best friend I was supposed to have in my life but never got. You're the Will to my Grace.

posted 11-30-2007 03:50 PM               

Last week, apparently, my friend Kim asked me and my other friend Stephanie if we wanted to go see her boyfriend's play. We both agreed, said whatever, etc. Kim asked me if I could drive, and I said sure. Well, after a week, I forgot about it and was reminded only on Wednesday when Stephanie asked me if I was still going, because she couldn't on account of she didn't realize that the play was $20 a ticket, not to mention train fare and dinner, etc. Well, I forgot about the whole thing and really didn't feel like spending the money. So, today, I asked Kim if it was all right if I didn't go, and she got REALLY upset, like, on the verge of crying. She said I was her ride. As in, she couldn't go without me. I found this a little odd, but, I didn't realize this. I figured she was just trying to do me a favor, seeing as it would be easier for me to drive rather than have her drive. Well,, I didn't know what to do. I really couldn;t afford it, she wasn't gong to pay me gas money, and I really just felt like she was using me for my car. I think it was ridiculous that I had this kind of obligation, and when I asked everyone they said "don't feel guilty if you don't want to go; you don't have to".

I mean, I was working from 9-3 on my window display, and I got very little sleep last night. i didnt feel like driving around Long Island, seeing a play I didn;t want to see, and spend the night with my friend and her boyfriend like a third wheel.

Oh, and the best part is, when I was installng my window, she was sleeping. Where? I don;t know, but I was looking for her for almost an hour and I was just like "Fuck this, I can't wait around for her" so I left and told Stephanie to tell Kim I had to leave. Whats worse is, there was this thing on Broadway I wanted to go to today: a celebration that the strike was over, with Bernadette Peters and Angela Lansbury. I didn't get to go because of this shit.

posted 11-30-2007 04:18 PM               

You're not really being an ass at all. You should have been an ass, sounds like she deserved it.

Next time be assier (is that a word?).