posted 07-08-2007 11:44 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Saint Aelphaba:
And to the dating question: How the hell would I know. I've only been kissed once, and I haven't spoken to said person since.

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Wow- are you my long lost twin? It's really awkward when I see that person, too.

For me, after that whole episode, it seems like I've been afraid to date someone else. This really sweet guy keeps asking me out and I really want to go out with him, but I'm afraid that something bad (emotionally) will happen. Any advice?

posted 07-08-2007 11:18 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DefyingGravity4Life:
Wow- are you my long lost twin? It's really awkward when I see that person, too.

For me, after that whole episode, it seems like I've been afraid to date someone else. This really sweet guy keeps asking me out and I really want to go out with him, but I'm afraid that something bad (emotionally) will happen. Any advice?

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posted 07-09-2007 08:04 AM            

Uh, odd questions.. Nope, I think Caitlin and I covered 'em all.

posted 07-09-2007 08:57 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MusicalTheatreObsessed:
When you break up with someone, is there like a waiting period before you start dating someone else?

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If it feels right, then just go for it. I started dating my current boyfriend maybe only a couple of weeks after ending a 6 1/2 year relationship. We became very good friends first though which a lot of the judgmental college kids that I knew at the time considered dating. They were all on crack.

posted 07-11-2007 05:47 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Skittles of Domsers:
Ah-Hah! You and Caitlin DID NOT cover everything!

Does anyone know how to force feed a blind alligator lizard that doesn't bite anything it touches? I know, weird little lizard... goes completely against the grain of any alligator lizard I've ever met. Or got bitten by.

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Are you like some sort of half-troll?
You know, only posting stuff about Aligators, please stop, if you are. If you've posted anything else, let me know. Anyway. (Yes, we did cover EVERYTHING, in the realm of which this topic was sort of started.) Romantic wise.

My question:

Say you email someone, and getting a response back from them in very important to you (it's not business or school related) and if they don't respond to the email in a while is it okay to send another email clarifying say even in the subject who it is? Or would that be too pushy and stupid?

posted 07-11-2007 06:13 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Saint Aelphaba:
My question:

Say you email someone, and getting a response back from them in very important to you (it's not business or school related) and if they don't respond to the email in a while is it okay to send another email clarifying say even in the subject who it is? Or would that be too pushy and stupid?

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No, I think if it's important to you it's okay to send it again. I usually do, but sometimes I just give up. But yeah... I'd say, send it again! If they don't respond this time send them a firm virtual kick in the shin.

posted 07-11-2007 08:17 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Yero the Hero:
I recently passed by two synogauges and noticed that both of them had large menorahs in front.

Is the menorah that important? I always likened it with Channukah, and therefore thought this would be the equivalent of having a christmad tree in front of a church. Is that just wrong?

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I love that you asked that.

And you know what? Most likely what you saw, was not a Channukah Menorah have eight candle holders like this:

While Channukiahas, have seven holders. They both represent the Burning Bush, from when Moses talked to God and was told to go ask Pharoh to "let my people go."

Recap: The Channukiah burns all the time. (That's why it's there.) Does that make sense? One burns only during Channukah (Menorah) while the Channukiah burns all the time. And usually, the Channukiah is made from plastic and is much larger. We have one in our synongoge above our beema.

You know what's funny? The Channukah story? That's totally made up. THe real story is a war story. The Jews (Macabes) marched up the hill, killed their opponents and marched down the hill (basically) and the "burning oil" was made up 500 years later by a whole different civilization.

But the destruction of the two temples, that did happen.

It's not wrong, to think that. I actually didn't know the difference until a couple years ago.

Hope that answers your question!

My question (I'm sorry I have another)

So, there's this guy. He doesn't live anywhere near me, and we don't talk, haven't talked since we left camp three weeks ago. Am I allowed to be jealous/pissed off if some girl from camp (any girl for that matter) comes along and asks for his phone number or something akin to that? Or would that be out of line, because I haven't spoken to him and don't plan on it?

posted 07-11-2007 08:17 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by glinda101:
if u r a boy and u make out with barney r u considered a gay person

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gay and into beastiality.

posted 07-11-2007 08:21 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Saint Aelphaba:

My question (I'm sorry I have another)

So, there's this guy. He doesn't live anywhere near me, and we don't talk, haven't talked since we left camp three weeks ago. Am I allowed to be jealous/pissed off if some girl from camp (any girl for that matter) comes along and asks for his phone number or something akin to that? Or would that be out of line, because I haven't spoken to him and don't plan on it?

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posted 07-12-2007 10:02 PM               

Can anyone bump it for me?

(I apologize for the inadvertant double post)

posted 07-12-2007 10:39 PM               

Anyway I messeged her, before I noticed the comments from Lane, and asked why she friended me.

I found my cousins Tommy and Danny on myspace a few months ago and though I've made several attempts to make conversation with them, nobody will actually message me back. Tommy did for a while, but has since stopped.

I was just wondering if you all thought I should continue pursuing my cousins in hopes of forming some sort of friendship or just ignore it? I mean my family isn't exactly there for me... you know?

And... what kinds of things should I say... I haven't ever met Christina before and haven't seen Lane since we were infants together, and Tommy and Danny it's been like 10 years? Though Lane and I did talk on the phone once a week when we were preteens.

posted 07-16-2007 12:27 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Saint Aelphaba:
Are you like some sort of half-troll?

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Stop it, you're making me blush!

Oh, and it died so expect me to shut up. And yes, I have posted other than alligator lizards. Allow two minutes for an edit.

I put up an interesting argument (in my unhumble and biased opinion) with Twyzler about the Eragon book by Paolini a month or two back in the 'general chinwagging' thread. I'll get the page number in a second.

Top of Page 67, if you want to see the beginning just look at the bottom couple of posts to Page 66.

[This message has been regurgitated and then edited by Skittles of Domsers (edited 07-16-2007).]

posted 07-19-2007 12:08 AM            

About an hour ago, my father kicked my mom out of the house. It's very complicated, but to put it simply my mom had been living almost hedonistically. She wasn't doing any work around the house, and for about a year my family has put up with it. She started taking ballroom lessons, and ever since then shes been shirking off her responsibilities. My father thinks she might have cheated on him, but i thik he's gotten over that. But tonight he kicked her out because, according to him, she no longer cared for anything or anyone but herself.

My father told my mother that he was leaving for Vegas on Frinday for a high school reunion. He asked her to stay with us, her children, over the weekend. My mom said that she had plans, and wouldn't be here to watch us all weekend. My mom and dad got into a huge argument, I think they hit each other too, but eventually she got into her car and left.

About ten minutes later my dad called me and my brother downstairs into the living room to talk to us about it. He explained what had happened and that things are going to be rough from now on. He said he didn't want her back if she can't sacrifice a weekend for her kids. Worst of all, he said that it probably will end with my brother and I having to choose between him or my mother.

Before, I'd always said that if it came down to it I would choose to stay wih my father. That was before I actually had to choose. I love them both very much and I don't want to be in this position at all.

I don't know how to talk to this about my brother either. I'm older than him, I feel some responsibility for him. But we have never had a heart to heart before, and I don't know if either of us can handle one.

I'm scared and I don't know what to do. Is there any advice out there for me? Or anything at all?

posted 07-19-2007 05:34 AM               

You said your father had this talk with you after your mother had gone... I don't think this is a good way to start the situation out. If you can, I would suggest getting your parents, yourself, and your siblings together to all talk about it. Hearing one side of the story is never good, and it shouldn't be like this. Is should be a conscious family decision what happens. I don't know how old you are but assuming your in your teens, I don't beleive it is your responsibility to choose. You should never, ever be put in a situation where you have to choose between parents. If I'm not mistaken, if the parents can't agree where the children go, then the courts decide. As a side note, the courts don't seperate the children unless there is absolutely no possible way around it.

You mentioned being worried about a heart to heart with your brother. I absolutely hated my older brother, we didn't get along and basically never even spoke until my parents seperated. Sadly sometimes it takes something like that to really pull people together. I think you'll be suprised how easily a conversation like this will come, when the time is right. You are free to instigate a heart to heart though, and see if what your brother needs right now is someone to talk to about all of this. And you don't always have to be the one to protect him in this. You can learn a lot from him as well, and the two of you can help each other through.

As a little bit of a warning, your parents very well could be a heck of a lot better people then mine. However when my parents split up they had a nasty habbit of talking bad about each other to me, and being young and insecure about the situation I let it happen. Don't let yours. The releif in my life when I finally told them to stop was a difference of night and day.

posted 07-19-2007 10:04 AM            

I will disagree that I think you should be given the right to choose a parent. Based on previous posts from you, I'd assume that your mother isn't the best person, and I would understand why you wouldn't want to live with her, though, also understanding that she is still your mother through it all. However, I do vaguely remember a post about her making comments about you must be fat because she is thinner than you, or something to that effect. That is NOT a healthy environment for you live in.

It may prove difficult to get your entire family together to discuss this, as it seems your mother's priorities are a bit mixed up and her family isn't coming first. Having said that though, I think it would show extreme maturity if you do at least try. If it doesn't work, at least you know you attempted it and it's not anyone's fault but the person who chooses not to accept it.

As far as your brother goes, I will agree with MTO. I'm sure underneath it all, what he needs most right now is his sister. You don't have to smother him, but let him know that you need him and he'll most likely open up to you in his own time as well.

I do hope that everything gets better, as I know that it will never be "okay" per se, but you have friends who will always be there to listen.

posted 07-19-2007 10:37 AM               

i speak from experience when i say that, yes these situations suck...alot. but i have also learned that it can bring family alot closer. you said you were never too close with your brother. i was the same with my dad. we butted heads my entire childhood. then my mom left and all of a sudden, my dad stepped up to the plate and he is closer with all three of us than ever before.
take the time to be upset about it. share that with your brother. just rememeber that it is not your burden to carry.

i agree with Pan when she says that it would probably be better for you to live with your dad. you are after all, still growing up and it would be unfair to you if you had to pick up after your own mother all the time. you do not need that instability right now.

i hope i helped a bit. i'm not saying i know exactly what you're going through, but i have been through a similar situation. if you want to talk or email in private, i am here 100%.
i do believe my email is in my user profile here. if not, it's helentrip at hotmail dot com or else look up Helen T on facebook.

posted 07-19-2007 03:34 PM               

I'm just here to tell you that in my life growing up I was put in the position several times where they told me to choose between a steady roof over my head and my brother and every single time I chose my brother, I do not regret this. Your brother does need you, even if you aren't that close. Just let him know you're there.

I know this really sucks now... in ten years time you might have a different opinion.

posted 07-19-2007 03:44 PM               

*hugs*

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape, Dumbledore!

posted 07-24-2007 11:56 AM               

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year now. We're both 16, so I know that maybe being as attatched to him as I was was slightly unhealthy, but he was there for me when my best friend commited suicide and in a way I guess I tried to use him as a replacement, but I really did fall in love him. He was a great person and always there when I needed him. My parents really didn't like him though, not because of who he was, but because he wasn't Jarrett (the best friend). So about 6 months into the relationship, they told me that they didn't want me seeing him anymore. Needless to say, I did anyway.
Well once summer started and we weren't seeing eachother in school anymore, we were sneaking around alot more. This meant often sneaking out of the house at midnight to go meet him. My mom knew that it was going on simply because of the clues left not only around the house but in my attitude, but she couldn't do anything because she hadn't caught me. I watched my relationship with my mother completly deteriate, which killed me. I started spiraling into a depression. I stopped eating and lost 20 pounnds over the course of a month (which doesn't sound like much until you realize that I only had 120 to work with in the first place) and just recently got to the point of being seriously suicidal. I finally realized that if I didn't get absolutly everything out in the open and fast, it was going to lead to my self destruction. For me, that meant getting caught sneaking out of the house at midnight. So Friday night I made sure to tell my parents that I was getting to the point of being suicidal ensuring that I would be checked up on that night and then I left. I saw I found Denny and we talked about everything. I told him that my parents were out looking for me and that if he didn't get home soon, his would be out looking for him too. He chose to stay with me. The next day we sat down with his parents and my parents where he pretty much calls me a controlling bitch and breaks up with me, breaking my heart in front of both of our families. Both of our parents decided we should be banned from seeing eachother until school started. I was perfectly willing to take my amount of blame in the deal, but I hoped he would too, and instead he sold me down the river. He later myspaces me saying that we should get back together once school starts again. Part of me wants to, but that's how I got here in the first place. And I'm a major actor at our school theatre and he's a major techie there, so there's no way we'll be able to just avoid each other. I'm just increadibly hurt and don't know how to handle the whole thing.

posted 07-24-2007 02:04 PM               

You're obviously incredibly aware of your own feelings and what you need to do, even if you're not sure how to go about it. I think you really need to talk to someone about how you're feeling right now, and not just your parents. Maybe go and see your doctor. You've already lost your best friend, you can't go losing yourself as well.